How to Set Healthy Boundaries When You Have Relationship Anxiety
Relationship anxiety can turn even the most fulfilling relationships into a source of constant worry and self-doubt. You might fear rejection, obsess over disappointing others, or find yourself asking, Why is my relationship anxiety so bad? or How do I cope with relationship anxiety? These anxious thoughts can drain your mental and emotional energy, making it difficult to feel secure and relaxed. If this sounds familiar, setting healthy boundaries can be a crucial step toward relief.
Why Boundaries Matter for Relationship Anxiety
Relationship anxiety often leads to people-pleasing, overcommitting, and neglecting your own needs. These patterns can intensify your anxiety, leaving you feeling resentful, drained, and out of control. Setting clear boundaries helps break this cycle by establishing what is and isn’t acceptable in your relationships.
Boundaries can also give you a sense of control and security within your relationships. When you communicate your needs openly and respectfully, you show self-respect and teach others to respect you. Setting boundaries isn’t about pushing people away; it’s about fostering healthier connections by making sure everyone’s needs—including your own—are acknowledged and valued.
Signs You Might Need to Set Boundaries
People experiencing relationship anxiety often show these signs:
Saying "yes" to requests, even when you want to say "no."
Seeking constant reassurance or approval from others.
Feeling emotionally drained or anxious after social interactions.
Worrying intensely about disappointing or upsetting others.
Overanalyzing how others perceive you.
Identifying these patterns can help you recognize where boundaries are missing and implement specific boundaries that can reduce anxiety and preserve your emotional energy.
Steps to Set Healthy Boundaries
Identify Your Needs: Reflect on situations that trigger your anxiety or make you feel overwhelmed. Knowing your needs helps you decide where to set boundaries.
Start Small: Begin by setting simple, manageable boundaries. For example, decline an extra commitment if you’re feeling stretched too thin or set aside time for self-care.
Communicate Clearly: Use “I” statements to express your needs calmly and confidently. Instead of saying, “You’re always demanding my time,” say, “I need some time to recharge after work.”
Accept Discomfort: It’s normal to feel anxious or guilty when you first enforce boundaries. This discomfort doesn’t mean you’re wrong—it’s a sign that you’re challenging old patterns and growing.
Stay Consistent: Reinforce your boundaries by sticking to them. The more consistent you are, the more others will respect your limits, and the less anxious you’ll feel over time.
You might wonder, Does relationship anxiety go away? While it may or may not disappear entirely, setting boundaries can significantly reduce its impact and help you manage it effectively.
How Therapy Can Help
Even with the best strategies, setting boundaries can feel overwhelming when relationship anxiety is intense. Therapy provides a supportive space to explore your anxiety, understand its root causes, and develop personalized strategies for healthier relationships.
At Dr. Dawn Johnson & Associates, we specialize in helping people manage relationship anxiety and build stronger, more fulfilling connections. Our experienced therapists can help you gain confidence in setting boundaries, reduce anxiety, and prioritize your emotional well-being. We are here to support you every step of the way. Let us help you start building a healthier, more sustainable success story by following these three simple steps:
Schedule a free 20-minute consultation to see if anxiety therapy is right for you.
Begin meeting with one of our skilled anxiety therapists.
Start coping with your relationship anxiety.
Other Services Offered at Dr. Dawn Johnson & Associates in Washington D.C. & Virginia
At Dr. Dawn Johnson & Associates, we want to help you thrive. In addition to helping you manage stress as a high-achiever with anxiety therapy, we also offer services for those struggling with depression, relationships, infertility, academic or work concerns, disordered eating, and more